Enemies

Lately I've been meditating on what I consider to be my enemies.  After I identify what they are, I try to deconstruct my mental formations that label them as so.  Through this process I hope to realize that I have no real enemies and that what I consider to be an enemy is simply a construction of my own misconceptions.  While doing this, I came to realize that I consider most men to be my enemy; young, old, big or small they all get categorized as an enemy.  When in the presence of a man, I immediately put my guard up.  This guard keeps me at arms length and never allows a real connection to develop.  While trying to bring this barrier down, I was met with a lot of resistance within myself.  My mind was fighting back telling me that this barrier is necessary and protects me from the evil that men carry within them.  I do not think that there is one cause for this fear and I think it is present in many women.  It could have been passed on to us from previous generations, taught to us through media, or developed from personal experiences.  I would love to approach every man with no fear yet I believe that a certain amount of fear is useful.  Maybe fear is not the right word but at least a prudence that keeps us aware of the risks.  Many times I have found myself in unsafe situations because I had too much trust in someone that I knew too little.  There is nothing worse than being on the wrong end of a man's uncontrolled anger or being seen as a sexual object.  These threats are real but with the definition of enemy as "something that harms or weakens" I can accept the existence of these threats without allowing them to become my enemy.  The negative emotions or actions of men cannot harm or weaken me if I do not allow them to.  I can approach men prudently being aware of the risks without letting the fear of them grow out of proportion. In trusting that I am capable of detecting the possible presence of threats, I can remain open in situations where none exist.  In this way men are no longer my enemy and the threats that they may present are manageable risks.  Only with trust can real relationships form and fear is the ultimate adverse of trust.  I need to trust my own judgment and in turn be open to trusting the people that I find trustworthy.